The LOVEolution

Wanted to share this website:

The LOVEolution: Experience the healing feeling of love

http://www.love-olution.com

New site

Here is a link to a new site that I'm working on for a company called PM&J:

PM&J

2008: The Year of Love

Check out the new site that my friend and I started:

The Year of Love

My New Website

Check out my new website at:

LifeButSimpler.com

The Ultimate Secrets of Total Self-Confidence

I recently found a whole bunch of great books at the annual Wake County library sale. They let you fill up a bag of books for 2 bucks, so I got about a dozen books or so for $2 total!

I just finished reading one book called "The Ultimate Secrets of Total Self-Confidence." It had kind of a new age feel to it, but there was a lot of really interesting stuff, so I thought I'd share some passages:

Mistaken Certainties

"You can only change yourself to the degree that you become aware of your mistaken certainties. Most of your troubles arise from expectations which have not become realities. And most of your disappointments from your mistaken ideal of what you think you 'should' or 'ought' to do, or be, according to your present level of awareness."

Conformity

"Conformity is one of the greatest psychological evils of humankind. The person caught in this destructive habit never does anything worthwhile with his life. He wants to be a great person, independent and do important things. But he can't. His motivation to always be approved of prevents him."

Comparison

"Comparison is a sign of poor self-esteem. The person who compares himself to others lives in a state of fear. He fears those he imagines are above him. Believing them to be smarter, he feels unable to stand his ground. He fears those he imagines are below him because they seem to be catching up...The only way to get through life, he concludes, is to beat people at their own game. But, as his primary concern becomes being "one up" on the next person on his imaginary ladder, life loses its enjoyment."

Praise-Seeking and Recognition

"If you are to be totally free and self-confident, you must cease being caught in the trap of praise-seeking. To break this destructive habit, you must stop placing others above yourself. Never look up to anyone for any reason. If you do this you will never have to seek their approval and will no longer be seduced by praise or intimidated by blame...The difference between praise and recognition may be subtle but it is highly important in developing a positive self-confident personality. If people are not given the recognition they need to make them feel accepted as the truly unique individuals they are, they will resort to seeking praise and become its prisoner."

"Lack of recognition or appreciation of individual uniqueness is another parental failing. Most parents pay little regard to their children's feelings, desires and opinions, rebuffing them with such maxims as, "Children should be seen and not heard!" and "Mother/Father knows best!" They take disagreement as either a personal affront or out-and-out disrespect. Leading analysts agree that this attitude is due to a low self-esteem which manifests itself in the need to always be right. These kinds of parents believe their child alone has a problem but, actually, the problem is a mutual one, involving both themselves and their offspring."

Addictions

"Low self-esteem has many manifestations or addictions. These can be described as the means and habits we develop to escape the demands of everyday living. They are simply alibis that permit us to temporarily avoid facing up to personal reality. The severity of the addiction we choose is in direct ratio to our sense of inadequacy and fear of having to justify who and what we are. The addicted person uses his alibi to cover up the low self-esteem he doesn't want others to see."

Motivation

"In essence, no one can be motivated. Everyone is self-motivated. YOU WILL ALWAYS DO WHAT YOU WOULD RATHER DO THAN NOT. This generates your particular motivation. Every action you take is a response to a personal need or desire that is determined by your present level of awareness. Normally, your basic motivation is to feel good--mentally, physically, emotionally and spiritually. If your needs in any one of those areas are unfulfilled, they will create a sense of frustration and anxiety and you will do whatever you feel necessary to make yourself comfortable, even if that action is harmful to yourself."

Visualizations (Visual Affirmations)

"Visualize yourself having, doing or being the things you want. Feel yourself enjoying them. See the details--colors, places and people--as vividly as you can. Hold the pictures clearly in your mind. Most important--you must put yourself in the picture. Get yourself a scrapbook and call it "Blueprint of Destiny." In it, put colored pictures of the things you want, the places you want to go or the things you want to do. Look at the pictures every day and let them seep into your subconscious. Soon, you will master the technique of visualization and, in the process, desire will become reality."

Getting what you want

"Keep in mind the Biblical admonition, "With all thy getting, get wisdom and understanding." It is best not to ask for things. Don't ask for a new car, money or a new home. Ask for the wisdom necessary to go about getting those things. If your ambition is to be an artist, actress, business executive, or anything else, ask for the wisdom to guide you in achieving it. Wisdom is the only thing God has to give you. You must use it and do the rest yourself. You can pray your heart out but God, who must rule His Universe by Law, cannot change things just for you. Only by gaining wisdom, will you know how to work with the Law and bring forth your desires."

Getting along with people

"Be friendly and let the conversation take its own course...And don't try too hard. From the beginning, take for granted that the person will like you, and he will!"

A Letter from my Future Self

The other day, I came up with the idea to write an encouraging letter to myself. The twist is that the letter would be from myself 20 years in the future. The idea is to motivate myself by focusing on how I want to be in twenty years, and then envisioning what I 'did' to get there. It was inspired in part by listening to a self-hypnosis mp3.

Side note: Self-hypnosis is something that I've recently started doing. (It has nothing to do with a man holding a swinging watch and sporting a ridiculous mustache.) All you do is go to http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/?1688 and find a topic that interests you, such as getting over your fear of failure, losing weight, or building your self esteem, and download that mp3. Play the mp3 in a place where you can sit or lie down and not get distracted. The speaker will guide you through a session of deep relaxation where he will coach your unconscious mind to begin a new way of thinking. I've been using self-hypnosis for a few months now, and I've already seen a lot of improvements in my life.

OK, onto the letter:

Dear Justin,
First of all, I want to tell you to stop worrying. You and I both know that God is in control, and all you need to do is follow Him wholeheartedly. I am really proud of your recent efforts at self-improvement. Keep it up! Self-improvement is a lifelong process. Just remember not to overdo it. It is easy to read and read and read, especially with the Internet, but it is better to read one thing and then work on putting it into practice. And don't forget the ultimate act of self-improvement: Prayer.

God can tell you something in just 30 minutes of prayer that it takes some people a lifetime to learn on their own.

Second, keep working hard on your business. It's really going to pay off big-time. Think about your wildest dreams and then multiply that by about 10. I know sometimes it feels like there's no logical way for that to happen, but when God is your boss, things have a way of happening. I won't say too much, because nobody should know too much about his own future...plus, I don't want to ruin the excitement for you.

Last, don't forget who you are. You are a child of the Most High God. You don't have to go through life relying on your own strength. Pray as often as possible. God never gets tired of hearing from you. In fact, you may want to cut some things out of your life in order to make more time to pray. I know it seems like you wouldn't be as productive if you devoted 2 hours a day to prayer, but maybe you could just try it for a week...it couldn't hurt...

Love, Future Justin

In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day

I just finished reading a book called "In a Pit with a Lion on a Snowy Day", written by Mark Batterson. Mark is the lead pastor at National Community Church in Washington DC, which meets in movie theaters at metro stops.

The book was one of the most inspiring books I've read in a long time, so I wanted to share some of the points that I found the most interesting.

The premise of the book comes from an obscure story in II Samuel about a warrior named Benaiah, who chases a lion into a pit and kills it. Mark points out that the most amazing thing about the story is not just that he killed a lion, but that he chased it. Most people don't chase lions. They run the other way. But Benaiah chased the lion into a pit (in snowy conditions, which would have made for an even bigger advantage for the lion), and he killed it, against all odds.

After killing it, Benaiah gets the job as King David's bodyguard and the commander of his army.
Mark makes the point that we can look at Benaiah's story as a metaphor for the Christian life. Benaiah took a huge risk by chasing that lion, but he leveraged it into a position that made him the second-most powerful man in the country. God calls us all to take some pretty big risks in life. If we don't take Him up on them and we just play it safe, we're limiting God's power to take us further in life. But if we trust in God and take those risks, he can take us further than we ever thought possible.

I'd like to share some quotes from the book that I found really interesting:

"I think the church has fixated on the sins of commission for far too long. We have a long list of don'ts. Think of it as holiness by subtraction. We think holiness is the byproduct of subracting something from our lives that shouldn't be there. And holiness certainly involves subtraction. But I think God is more concerned about sins of omission--those things we could have and should have done. It's holiness by multiplication. Goodness is not the absence of badness. You can do nothing wrong and still do nothing right. Those who simply run away from sin are half-Christians. Our calling is much higher than simply running away from what's wrong. We're called to chase lions."

"Too often our prayers revolve around asking God to reduce the odds in our lives. We want everything in our favor. But maybe God wants to stack the odds against us so we can experience a miracle of divine proportions. Maybe faith is trusting God no matter how impossible the odds are. Maybe our impossible situations are opportunities to experience a new dimension of God's glory."

"The more we grow, the bigger God should get. And the bigger God gets, the smaller our lions (problems) will become."

"In his Letters to Malcolm, C.S. Lewis said 'If God had granted all the silly prayers I've made in my life, where would I be now?' Lewis went so far as to say that someday we'll be more grateful for our prayers that didn't get answered than the ones that did. The reason for this is simple: Many of our prayers are misguided. We pray for comfort instead of character. We pray for an easy way out instead of the strength to make it through. We pray for no pain, when the result would be no gain. We pray that God will keep us out of pits and away from lions. But if God answered our prayer, it would rob us of our greatest opportunities. Many of our prayers would short-circuit God's plans and purposes for our lives if He answered them. Maybe we should stop asking God to get us out of difficult circumstances and start asking Him what He wants us to get out of those difficult circumstances."

"We want control, but the decision to follow Christ is a relinquishment of control. Following Christ is letting Jesus take the wheel...But faith involves a loss of control. And with the loss of control comes uncertainty...And faith is the willingness and readiness to embrace those uncertainties."

"Everyone's path is littered with the debris of dysfunction and disappointment. We've all been misjudged or misled. And we will be many more times before our lives are over. But God is in the business of using those experiences to prepare us for future opportunities."

"As I look back over my life, the greatest breakthroughs have happened while I've been in prayer mode. Prayer is an opportunity incubator. When I'm not in prayer mode, I have good ideas. But when I'm in prayer mode I have God ideas. And I'd rather have one God idea than a thousand good ideas."

"In the long run, opportunity costs are always more damaging that actual costs. Far too many people think of righteousness in terms of actual costs instead of opportunity costs. We mistakenly think of righteousness as doing nothing wrong when, in fact, righteousness is doing something right. Righteousness isn't just running away from sin. Righteousness is chasing lions."


Mark Batterson runs a great website/blog called Evotional.com. You can also find podcasts of his sermons here:
http://theaterchurch.com/media/podcast